I don’t often have the opportunity to attend formal events but I absolutely love to get dressed up, so I was super stoked when my husband received an invitation to a fancy work dinner! My first thought, in all honesty, was “yum free filet Mignon!” I was so excited about the food that I initially forgot I’d need formal wear and then when I remembered it was kind of like a Homer Simpson “doh” smack-my-own-forehead kind of thing. I had about two weeks to throw together something suitable and my only budget was a $20 gift card to a craft store. (I feel like I saw something like this on Project Runway once upon a time, lol!)
Also, at this point, I would just like to point out that I *thought* I read “black tie” on the invite and it wasn’t until about two days before the event that my hubs pointed out that it actually said “semi-formal.” But fuck it, I spent time and energy assembling this ensemble so I wore it anyway. Besides, I’m used to feeling over-dressed ha!
First things first, before I run out to buy something new, I always look through my wardrobe to see if there’s anything I have that I could use. I have a few items, like my little black dress, that I have so few occasions to wear that I sometimes forget I even have them so it’s good for me to re-familiarize myself with all the things draped in plastic hanging at the very back of a dark closet once in awhile. The last time I had a formal event to attend was…let’s see…back in 2015 I think, and I cannot for the life of me remember where it was or what I wore. But as I was pawing through a couple dusty garment bags, I rediscovered my lovely bridesmaid dress that I wore as Megan’s Matron of Honor back in October 2014, a beautiful strapless floor-length gown with pockets in deep plum faux silk. The last (and only) time I wore it, I had given birth about six months prior and was still breast-feeding so I was about two dress sizes & three bra sizes larger than I am now, so it needed to be taken in a bit in the bust and waist. Other than that, though, it would do just fine.
I wanted to attempt an elegant old Hollywood angle to the outfit, so I rifled through my limited collection of accessories to find pieces that would work. I tried pairing my grandma’s vintage beaded purse with pearls but the look was too light and subtle for what I was attempting to pull off, so I decided to go full-tilt sparkles with black accents, which helped pare down my choices. I ended up selecting my black glitter H&M envelope clutch and gifted glitter belt as the basis for my accouterments.
Shoes always prevent a bit of a problem for me because I can’t sacrifice comfort for style what with my fibromyalgia. I try to find a happy medium between comfy and chic, but nine times out of ten I just end up wearing my Chucks. For this event, I thought I’d just slip on some simple black flats but there was something dull and boring about them so I went about finding a way to jazz them up. The simple solution? Glitter nail posh from the dollar store and some shoe-weatherproofing-spray that we already had on hand. I love how they turned out! The sparkles have an almost galaxy-print effect that I find beautifully mesmerizing.
OK, so, that’s shoes, purse, and belt. Check. Next up: jewelry! With my tattoos and the strapless sweetheart neckline of the dress, I bypassed the idea of a necklace and instead chose to focus on some serious statement earrings. I headed to the craft store, armed with my gift card and a vague plan of what I was looking for.
BAD IDEA. Going to a huge craft store without a decisive list of what I need is just plain stupid. I could easily spend hours comparing similar items and hemming & hawwing over the plethora of options on offer. There are just too many damn choices! I ended up with a bag full of stuff that I didn’t really need, so a return trip was necessary to exchange a few items. The final purchases to come home were a set of Swarovski cubic zirconia pendant beads and a pair of clearance crystal bow-tie stud earrings. I attached jumper hoops to the earrings and then hung a pendant on each, creating my own custom vintage-style ear ornaments. I had some pendants leftover from the pack I bought, so I gently rounded one with pliers and glued it onto a simple band to make a matching cocktail ring too. These babies pack some intense wow-factor, which is just what I wanted since that’s the only jewelry I was wearing.
When I started to think about my hair, I had kind of a panic moment. I haven’t had hair this long since I was in kindergarten and I have little to no idea how to take care of it or what to do with it. I consulted my friend Google and after a bit of research decided to go with a simple chignon, which I was able to figure out relatively quickly and painlessly. If we were any closer to Spring, I would have opted for a flower in my hair – like a nice orchid or lily perhaps – but since it’s dead winter and I was going for an overall sparkly theme I chose to whip up a few crystal pins to stick into my birdsnest here and there.
The last thing I had to figure out, which is def one of my fashion Achilles heel weaknesses, was makeup. I p much just suck at makeup altogether. I rarely have the time or energy to fuck around learning new looks or techniques, and as such I only have like two or three basic aesthetics I can do. I started with the Clinique CC Cream that my mom gifted me as a base and added some organic mica highlighter that my sister made on my cheekbones, brow bones, and collarbones. For my eyes, I broke out my Cover Girl Eye Enhancers palette in Urban Basics in combination with my trusty favorite eye crayon, my ol’ faithful Revlon Super Length Mascara in blackened brown, and my elf Instant Lift Brow Pencil in taupe. I wanted to add a pop of color on my lips, so I chose the Milk Tint K-beauty lip stain that my daughter gave me because it not only is a great bright lavender hue, but the color stays on for hours even while eating or drinking so I wouldn’t have to worry about re-applying all night long. (Although I did stick a tube of Burt’s Bees Pink Blossom tinted lip balm in my gown pocket just in case!) The finishing touch was a coat of L’Oreal Colour Riche nail polish in glittery “Statement Piece” gold.
As much fun as it was to get all dressed up, it took me quite awhile and I was pretty wiped out before we even got in the car. But my excitement built as we pulled up to the Aqua Turf Club, which incidentally was the same venue that both my husband and I went to the prom at (different schools and years though.) It was effing magical to be able to have the opportunity to basically go to Prom with my hubby!
We mingled and noshed on stuffed mushrooms & fancy cheeses, then sat down with some of Joe’s work buddies to enjoy dinner. I had a huge hunk of lovely filet Mignon and a couple glasses of red wine to go with it, so by the time dessert had been served we were all half in the bag and ready to dance. I swear, we spent more time on the dance floor than we did at our own wedding! It was fantastic.
For less than a few dollars, I was able to throw together a pretty decent formal ensemble! I felt like a sparkly princess all night long – except for the one time that I tripped over my dress trying to get up out of my chair after my third glass of wine LOL!
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Lauren you look stunning in that dress. I love it!! It’s perfect for you and any gown that has pockets is the ultimate ensemble. Of course it’s also my favorite color. So great to see you and Joe enjoyed your “prom” night.
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